A guy asked me out for coffee saying that he he just felt like he needed to to make more friends and I was like I took this at face value and I thought to myself. "You know, what? Yeah, I could use more friends. Dang it. I'll go on this date". Wait. No I will not I won't go on this date. I will go to coffee with this guy. Sorry, I have to go in a room because my children just got home. My children are very loud, like most children. So I said yes and I went and you know, it was okay. It was a little awkward because I'm just like, you know socially incompetent and he was a little bit awkward too and I went home, you know, he drove me home and I was like, "okay this is -- that was okay. Um a little odd". I probably wouldn't want to necessarily do it all the time. But he's a nice guy. Um, and then he wouldn't stop calling me. Like I went on vacation to the west coast to visit friends and I was hanging out with friends and he just kept calling me and I told my friend, my best friend, I was like, "I don't understand it. Like I'm on vacation. Why would you call somebody that you know is on vacation visiting people? Like they don't want to talk to you, they want to talk to their friends that they're visiting". And she very kindly was like, "Okay. I'm going to explain something to you. And that's that when a guy in his early twenties asks a girl in her early twenties out for coffee to be friends, what he means is that he is looking for a romantic partner and he would like to -- He would like you to go out with him to see if you could be potent -- like he likes you." Basically. Yeah. Yeah, and yes, I had to have somebody sit me down and tell me "hey if a guy asks you out for coffee, it means that he likes you." And I was incensed. I was like "Well dang it, if he -- he said he wanted friends". Like if he had straight up told me that he liked me, I could have turned him down and we could have avoided this…

So I've never eaten food that's made me sweat because I'm not one of those people that chases painful foods. And I don't understand why people do that. Sorry, if something was advertised to me that way then I would avoid that thing. I like spicy food, but not hot spicy. Like I don't need my food to be painful. I have almost passed out from the heat though. Once in high school, my friend wanted to surprise her parents by creating this little patio in their backyard. And so we got all the supplies from Lowe's, like all the brick thingys and then sand. And I don't remember what else but like it was super super hot and like so like unloading these like, I think they're like 50-pound bags of sand. And loading them in another truck and then unloading them at her house and then the same with the bricks and everything was just like super intense. And I got really dizzy and almost threw up and and then like almost passed out and I was like, "Whoa! Maybe you should take a break." This is not a dramatic story. But that was the time, I almost passed out.

There were many times where I would have a late class, be studying in the library, be doing things in the lab late at night. And you know when school's in session, it's the winter so it gets dark really early. You know, it could be seven, eight o'clock. It's not that late, but it's very dark. And just because Detroit has the reputation that it does, my mom always felt better if I had a male friend who was walking with me to my parking structure or to and from buildings. And what's odd to me is that I spent 10 years in martial arts and have two high degree black belts. So I have the ability to physically defend myself, but I also have the ability, the wherewithal to know who to call. Like campus security, the police department, or the you know the police. I know what to do if I feel unsafe, so the fact that I was specifically told to have a male with me, is also a double standard. Because again, it supports the notion that a woman is a dainty flower that needs to be protected. Rather than teaching people not to attack other people. If that makes sense. So, I think that that would be my experience with double standards. It's a lot of that, and it's very ingrained in conversation, very like a normal thing for a girl to grow up hearing. You know, "Don't dress this way because you're going to attract attention or attract problems," and so on. Rather like we're told that rather than hearing boys be taught, "They're just wearing clothes. They're not quote, 'Asking for it'." If that makes sense, boys are not taught, "Don't attack girls." Rather girls are taught "Don't do this because boys will be boys and attack you if you do." And I have a problem with that.

This kind of does remind me though of another time my sister and I were in the Dominican Republic and we were visiting a friend of hers from college there. And she had planned a day trip for us on a boat to you know - you take this boat out you go to this island, you stay there for a while and then you know, then you come back and it was I don't know if her friend knew exactly what the situation was or if she did and assumed that we would too but my sister and I were completely not prepared for what this trip actually was. It was totally a party trip.Like it was totally you drink from the moment that you get on this boat - probably even before you get on the boat. All through the boat, I mean people were just going crazy. I mean everybody was in their string bikinis jumping off the boat. I mean getting to the beach and you know, just totally, you know, totally a beach party trip. Totally not my sister and my scene at all, and neither one of us had our bathing suits which again, I guess you think okay, you're going on a boat and you're going to a beach on an island, yep we probably should have assumed that we needed our bathing suits. But we didn't, we're not super water people like we just we didn't we didn't even think. So we're - I'm, I was there - I think I even had like capris on I didn't even have like a skirt or shorts or anything. I mean, I think I had like sort of capris that definitely like covered my knee. I think they were black and then like just a t-shirt no tank top. No, I mean really again and I think everybody was kind of looking at the two of us like what is going on and my sister always wears like any time that she knows she's gonna be out in the sun - which again she kind of thought she was gonna be out in the sun being on a boat or at the beach she always wears long sleeves. And oftentimes long pants too with UV protective, um clothing because she burns so easily. So I'm pretty sure she had on like her full UV, you…

I think, uh, there was one rainbow in particular. It’s hard to pick your favorite rainbow in Iceland. It’s like picking your favorite child. But, one of the ways I convinced myself to put the money down to go to Iceland was we found a house in rural Iceland that was just – I guess you would call it a geodome? It wasn’t actually built like a house, persay. It was a dome. And, to get there, we had to drive down a road that seemed like it was being made as we were driving it. There was a grader, um, basically, digging up road and – it was dirt, and, like, the only way you could get down it was to gun it in our – in our Ford Escape – which was known as a “Kuga” in, in Iceland – or else you’d get stuck in the road. So it was basically in this back country location and, uh, it was pouring rain when we arrived, but only, like, halfsie, so, and that’s the perfect rainbow building conditions. And just over our geodome house was a double rainbow. That’s, um, it looked like someone had come through with marker and just drawn it in the sky, Photoshopped it with their bare hands. Which is just called coloring. Um, it was — it was so rad.

I got a little rainbow tidbit um last summer when I was on a road trip with my daughter. We stopped at a McDonald's for a quick meal. This Mickey D's had two driveways that both took you to the same drive through and I inadvertently cut a fellow off, he cursed at me and I shrugged in embarrassment. And I heard him yelling at me. I pulled up to the order box and told gal what we wanted to eat. We pulled forward and we waited in line to pay, he and his car load, he and his car load took their turn ordering their food. Sorry I am reading this. When I got to the Pay Here window, I paid for mine and my daughter's food and asked the gal how much the car behind me owed their food? It was $18 and some change, so I paid his bill too. We pulled forward and collected our food at the next window and as I was driving off, I heard the horn toot and thank you. It was a random act of kindness, but it was a rainbow to my embarrassment. And I probably made his day, too.

I love the stars. I love looking up at the stars. I will – oh my god, when I – couple years ago I went camping, um, in northern Michigan – I love Northern Michigan – um, with friends of mine. And we'd gone camping. And we were at this campsite near Mackinaw City and we literally spent – it was a really clear night. We spent the entire night just laying in the middle of the road in the campsite and, like, this dirt road, with blankets, um, staring into the stars. And I saw my first shooting star that night ‘cause – one, I don't think we'd ever been, um – it’s never been clear enough to see stuff like that, but we – we saw everything. Like, it was insane. Like, I know, still, with light pollution, there's still a lot that we can't see. Like, we're not even seeing the half of it, even when you think you're seeing all of it. Um, which is really neat to me, too. Um, but, yeah, it's really – I really like it. I like when it's dark enough that you can see all of that, um, and it's super cool. We, like, laid on the top of our cars and just, like, stared at the, uh, the stars for a little bit. And that was really cool. And I really liked that a lot.