But, um, it just — I just kind of messaged the — again, the woman who is now, like, trying to lead this and she was like, “Hey, is it okay if somebody does one of your tasks?” And I was like, “Yes, um, because the task list you gave me is impossible.” Like, I mean, she doesn’t know that because she doesn’t have any experience in any of these things. But it’s rid- — I don’t know, that’s — I was kind of laughing. But again, I shouldn’t be so cynical.
But I have this, this ginormous to-do list and some of my tasks are broken down into like eight lines, you know? Like, it’s like, um… Like imagine, for example, someone gives you a to-do list and it’s like “Make cookies” and then it says, like, “Put the flour in the bowl, and then mix with the eggs and the butter,” and then, you know, “Put the chocolate chips in. Then next,” you know, like, “Step six, like, put it on the tray and, like, put it into the oven,” and then “Step, like, eight,” you know, “Take it out and let it cool,” and then “Step nine, like, put it into a basket and wrap up with a blanket or something, like a towel,” and — right? Like that’s what, like, one of my to-do lists is, or like this massive to-do list — that’s what, like, one of the section is.
And then she has another one that’s like, you know, essentially the equivalent of being like “Make beef Wellington.” And it’s just one line, you know and it’s just like, “Okay. Well you do” — and then she’s — you know, and then as she’s messaging me, it’s kind of like this, like, “Oh, well, you know, you have” — if the first one with the cookies is like nine steps and this beef Wellington one is just one line, she’s like, “Oh you got ten things to do.” And I’m like, “No, no. No, I — no, it’s — I have like two things to do. And they both contain many steps. So…” I don’t know, like, I think it’s that, like, disconnection. And so it’s abso- — and I just told her — it’s absolutely insane to me that you realistically think that I can even do one of these things by the deadline like it’s just, it’s so… it’s so incredibly impossible that even just me — like it’s really not doing great for my morale, to legitimately know that I could, like, really push myself to the very edge and still not finish this, and so I guess I don’t know what to do about that.