“His book of CDs was sitting on his passenger seat“

Tell a story about a prank. This one just shot to my brain. Old one, pretty uncomfortable story. Not exactly. It's a prank on my friend in high school. His name was John. For the purposes of this recording, I will not use his real name, is John. And he was my friend in high school and I was also friends with another guy named [redacted friend's name]. And they hated each other just could not stand each other. I forget what sparked it, but something sparked it and they just thought of both of them just hated each other so much, thought the other one was useless.  And after some event, some school gathering or something, I thought we, I was in the parking lot by myself, walking, to my car walking past John's car, and he left his window open in his car, and his book of CDs was sitting on his passenger seat and, back when CDs where like the most common form of media, music. And I just was like, "Oh, I'm gonna steal these and John’s, gonna freak out and think that someone stole all of his CDs." Tthis is like a big deal, like you invested lots of money and I got this huge book with like 200 CDs, right? Well, 20 bucks, a pop. You do the math because I don't want to. So, I just took that giant book and thought it’d be funny. And waited. I took it and he, like I thought, he freaked out. And then, I told [the other friend] about the joke when he was at my house. And he was like, "Oh, that's hilarious. That's so funny. Let me take some of his CDs out of there and then when you give it back, he'll be like, 'Oh phew, it was just a prank.' But then later, he'll realize he's actually missing more CDs." I went along with that part of it and I kind of -- I definitely regret that because I don't know if John ever got those few CDs back afterwards. And I think I told John in conversation, like, after I gave him the CD book back and he's like, "Oh, like prank" and then later he's like, "Dude, there's still some missing." I was like, "oh, I bet {he} took some because he was at my house." And then I think…

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“He was a farmer through and through”

I just found out over the weekend that my great uncle passed on early, early Sunday morning. He had been struggling for quite some time, several months. He hasn't been doing that great and it was sort of a blessing, but it's always really hard. He was 91 and lived in [town,] Michigan most of his life. He taught for 30 years at the high school in [town] and I read the obituary and learned several things about him that I really did not know he -- he's not a blood relation, he married my mom's dad's sister. So again, my mom's uncle by marriage. So, I didn't grow up hearing as many stories about as about him, as I did about, Aunt [name]. But he was always a very, very nice man. Super hard worker. He said he worked at the high school for 30 years, but they also owned a cattle farm. Beef cattle farm. And he was a farmer through and through just really spent his life working on the farm and when he wasn't able to do that anymore, very recently, as I said 91, and he was still, still wanting to be out on the farm and it was just really hard for him when he no longer could really do that. And they sold their herd a while back, maybe a couple of years ago they sold that and then they just, like I think they're not even out yet, I think they have to be out of their farm, it's like 100 acres, 100 acre farm. I think they have to be out in September 1st or now my my aunt has to be out September 1st. So lots of changes happening up there, and I'm hoping it should work out that I can get a couple of days off work, so Mom and I can go up and see, see the family and my aunt is the only one left in that generation on that side of the family, so my grandpa passed and his two other sisters have already passed. So she's, she's kind of the last one.

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“So my photographer tried to freaking AI her out.”

My graduation went lowkey so poorly cause like there was this random lady who was handing out diplomas early, she wasn't supposed to be on stage. I don't know why I should try to sabotage all us, but she like sabotaged the first three people and I was the third person, and I didn't know and I like took the diploma from her even though like we had practiced a bajillion times to like take it from our school principal. I just I didn't know if like plans changed and I was supposed to take it from her so I wasn't gonna like embarrass her on stage, and I also wasn’t thinking because it was like a five-second whole process for like pictures and everything. So I just I literally took it from her and awkwardly stood with it, smiled, moved over to my principal where like he awkwardly took the diploma from my hand and like shook my hand and like I don't know, he gave me a new one. It was so awkward. And then I walked over and like, took the final picture and like the final picture -- freaking, my -- you could see my double chin and it's like, why? Like, I don't even have, I know it's not a big deal but like it was like the one and only picture where you could see like a double chin. And like it was my only good one. Like the only good one in terms of like scenery and background and I was like, “God damn,” you know?  And then I saw there was like, another one, where was it? Yeah, like the the middle one. They forgot to take the one like where I was shaking my principal’s hand. So I didn't even get that one and then the first one where I would like stood awkwardly like the lady was in the background and so my photographer tried to freaking AI her out and the people in the background ended up looking like actual monsters, like they had like one eye and like 12 fingers, like on like their hands looked so fricking -- it wasn't even 12, it was like 15 fingers. It looked fricking insane. Like everyone in the background looked so scary. Like there were like they had no facial features. Like there was this one guy without like a…

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“I will say this again: I hate spice”

One day, our Walmart person dropped off the wrong order. Now, we got everything we needed, just dropped off some of somebody else's order. Now, in that order there was Dorito -- hot Doritos. It was extra spicy hot Doritos. Now, let me tell you I am not a spice person. I hate spice. I despise spice. I will absolutely throw that spice out the window, out my home window, or even if the car is literally driving. I will not eat spice. Honestly, if someone kidnapped me and tried to force me to eat spice with a weapon, I would still not eat spice. Spice is the absolute worst for me. I cannot explain how much I hate spice. I like sour more than spice. I’d rather eat something sour than eat something spicy. Spicy, it burns your mouth. Sour, it just makes it hard. So, I absolutely despise spice, and I will never ever eat spice. Now, let me tell you about a story. So, yeah, we got Doritos that was spicy. And we got Doritos that was spicy and, um, he used to eat it when, you know, when they were kids. So basically, I tried one and it tasted so good, it was so good until the spice hit. When the spice hit, I like, I grabbed that milk and water so fast, and I had to drink it so fast because I hate spice. I will say this again: I hate spice.

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