“She kinda turned to me and told me, like, ‘She looks like an idiot with that leaf in her hair.’ “

I can remember, like, sitting in this meeting or getting ready to — the meeting to start or whatever and it was the beginning of the day and I was sitting there, you know, with my friends. And I didn’t really notice it, like it wasn’t a conscious noticing but it was just like a — I saw the one friend kinda lean over to the other friend and whisper something but I wasn’t thinking anything of it. I wasn’t thinking it was like about me or whatever.

And so the friend that got whispered to turned and looked at me and she said, “Oh,” like to me, she said, “Oh! Hold on, you have something, you know, in your hair,” because it was the beginning of the day, and maybe it was fall or whatever, I had a leaf in my hair and I didn’t realize it.

And I know the friend who did the whispering is kind of catty and kind of talks about other friends behind their backs and stuff. And I had asked the friend who took the leaf out of my hair, “Oh, thanks. How did you notice?”

And she said, like, “Oh actually, you know the other friend — ” I’m not using names or whatever, but she said, “She kinda turned to me and told me like, ‘She looks like an idiot with that leaf in her hair.’ “

And so I kind of thought that that was an admirable quality in a friend. One, she didn’t — the girl who took the leaf out of my hair didn’t, like, say to the other friend “Yeah, what an idiot” or, like, didn’t say anything. She actually, like, stopped the conversation and turned to me to fix the problem.

And I thought that that was a great friendship. So anytime after that, I have tried to model my life to be — you know, don’t talk about your other friends — don’t talk about anybody, really, in a negative manner to someone else.

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