Yeah, so we were having a quiet hour. And so he was with me and [Name]. He went to the bathroom. And so, we thought it'd be really funny to play -- like play a prank on him. So she has this one girl that she really likes, her name is Peggy, like music artist wise. But he just was -- he had his headphones on, he was ignoring us. We didn't like him ignoring us. So -- and Peggy, look her up. Very inappropriate. Very awesome. We disconnected his headphones, turned his volume all the way up, and then changed what he was listening to to Peggy. So when he came back in and he just -- he clicked play, he wasn't paying attention. It just started blasting the most heinous lyrics ever at full volume. But luckily our teacher is never in the room, so she didn't really care. He just got all red 'cause he disturbed everyone.

They actually told my sister the other week that she could no longer altar serve at our parish because she's a girl and they only want boys to altar serve, and they told her that she should join their new program for girls, um, because it's going to involve girls serving kind of behind the scenes. And their reasoning for that was that girls would more like enjoy being, um, in the background and being less visible during mass. And, I don't know -- I really do love my religion, but that just seems so backwards to me. I mean, there is no reason why a woman should not be allowed to altar serve, and I just think that is absolutely absurd. So, you know, I emailed the priest and I told him like, "These young girls on the altar, they're altar serving, they're inspiring more girls to wanna participate in the Catholic life." And you know what he said to me? He said, he -- he said, "I don't know how to respond to you, I'll get back with you in a week." So we'll see what he says, but, I don't know. I just thought this whole, this -- I -- you should see the email honestly, the email's just so backwards to me. I mean, telling women they can't serve on the altar, that's absurd. That -- it doesn't make any sense. I didn't know things like this could happen in this day and age, but apparently they can. {Sighs} Anyway, you can tell I'm a little bit enraged by it.

Note: There is language that is excluded in the transcript but not excluded in the audio. Have I ever gotten a fortune cookie that was spot on? No, but my friend has, we were like stressing for this math test. And we're like freaking out 'cause a bunch of the math teachers wouldn't teach us last year. Um, so we're freaking out. We're like, "We don't know how to do this! She never taught this! Why is this on the review guide? This isn't even our unit! Oh, crap, she gave us the senior kids' review guide? No wonder this makes no f***ing sense!" Whatever, all that stuff. This happened like last year, so I don't remember exactly. But we're stressing, we're freaking out. We're doing the DeltaMath, we're doing, you know, all that stuff. And she -- and we're at lunch. We're taking the test next block. So, fourth block. And um, yeah. So we're stressing out, we're freaking out, we don't really know what's going on. And then she pops open her fortune cookie, and she gets a fortune, and it says, "All of your stress will be over soon," or something like that, you know, whatever, whatever they say. And we just start bursting into laughing, and surprisingly that fortune cookie alone had the power to take away the stress that we had over this math test, and we both ended up getting As, so it was, you know, pretty cool.

So, I'm not a sporty girl. I sing, I act, but I don't play sports. But, everybody knows this. Like, I was the girl who, when we played basketball stations like in elementary school gym class, the teacher actually gave me different rules for every station because I was that bad at making baskets. Like, I just had no coordination. But one time, we were playing pickleball and it was, like, the first time I had ever played pickleball and we were doing a doubles tournament. So me and my equally unathletic friend -- I mean, like, we were the loner nerds that memorized digits of pi for fun, that had never played a sport in our lives -- we crushed everyone. Oh my gosh, we, like, went undefeated in this doubles pickleball tournament. We were just so good. And I mean, it was, like, a pretty equal team effort between the two of us. So, I know some people say that pickleball is not a real sport or that it's like a white person sport or an old lady sport. But pickleball, that is my sport. That is the sport that I can play and I can actually win at. So yeah. I don't know if I'd be any good anymore 'cause I haven't played it in like five years, but I was really good that time.

Diarist: So on Monda- -- like, mom and dad talked me into wrestling, 'cause like they thought that would be a good idea even though I have never been good in sports and I have always made it very clear how much I hate them.  Parent: But you like to fight. Diarist: I do like to fight, and I like fighting my friends, and I like fighting random people. I don't like when sports make you do quote-unquote "warm-ups," as in running around the track, like, 300 times.  Parent: I believe it was 1 and a half times is what got you [laughs]. Diarist: No, it was two. Parent: Okay. Diarist: And I have a fainting thing. I don't know exactly what it's called. But it was hot, we had already been our -- on our feet for like an hour and a half. And so he just tells us to run, and so I make it around twice and I'm feeling super light-headed. And I can barely make out like sentences 'cause I legitimately feel like I'm about to pass out. So I like go up to him, and I freak everyone out because I'm just like -- I sit down and he's like, "No, you can't sit down. You need to like, stay up," and so I'm like, "Okay, then I'm leaving." And I just pushed past him and the other coach, and I just leave. And then I like sit down for a few seconds and like, actually, like, get water and then I call mom. And then, yeah, I left, and that was mortifying.

I was gonna write an article about how to -- what's it called? "Tips on being happy by someone who is very much not a licensed professional," or something along those lines, a little more formal but you get what I mean. And so, one of those things is gonna be, "Get yourself something special that you can use every now and then." And what I do is I have these things called special socks. I don't wear them on special occasions, not like that. I wear them, and if I wear them, it means that that day is therefore special. It's one of those things where it's kind of like, there's nothing actually special about them, they're just pretty socks. But if I wear them, then it's like a little special gift for myself. It's like a little special gift I give to myself. And so it's kind of like, "Oh, since I'm wearing something different today, it must be a special day." And so, uh, it makes my day a little more happy, you know?

Today, I kinda acted a little bit out of line, though, in history class. Like I know I'm tired and I kinda had a bad birthday but that's really not an excuse for what I did. I mean, I didn't do anything like horrible. We were doing this debate on like who the Cold War was like caused by, I guess? I don't really know if that's the exact way to put it, but it was just a graded history debate. And I had had my hand up for over 23 minutes. And some people had talked four times and I had not been called on. So when I finally got called on I kinda said in a snarky voice like, "I wanted to actually go off of the first point that Name made about -- blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." And then I just started ranting, and eventually, I got to this point and I'm like, "We need to stop saying that this is about communism -- um, I mean, not about communism because it is about communism. I know it says that it's not about communism, but it clearly is, like, you have to look at the outside action." And the Lit teacher cut me off. She's like, "I don't even know what you're saying, but we, we don't have time for this side commentary." So I hope I didn't get a really bad grade.

Note: There is language that is excluded in the transcript but not excluded in the audio. I dressed up as Carrie, and I, like, covered myself in fake blood. And so, outside is the little kids that kinda just looked at me with fearful eyes because there was a crazy lady walking around covered in blood. There was also like this -- these two little kids, ‘cause we kinda were following this one group. Not really, but like, the neighborhood that we were in has, like, a very, like, -- it's like a flow that you can go -- no, not a flow, that’s a bad word. But like, a really, like, a very defined path that trick-or-treaters can take. And so we ended up leaving around this one time that a bunch of -- group of, like, -- a bunch of little kids went. So we started going and then one of these little kids tried to confront us. She, like, puffed out her chest and tried to be brave. And her little brother came along, he was practically shaking already. And so she started being, like, really rude and was like, "Why are you following us? You creepazoids!" Like all that. And so, me staying in character was like, "Well," -- I can't remember exactly what I said. I said something like, s*** -- I remember what [friend] said. I told them that like, I've been killing people, but it was like, "I just left, like, my prom." Like a bunch of stuff. And then [friend], because she dressed up as the Grim Reaper was like, "Yeah, for sure. Like, she's been killing people, that's why I'm following her around. It’s easier this way." I don't know. It's better, like, in the moment, but it was really funny.

One time me and my friends, we were in the backyard and it was like a hot day so we were just, like, we were, we were in the pool and stuff. And then from the backyard, I hear the doorbell ring. So I don't think any- -- I -- no, I heard somebody knock, but I wasn't sure if it was that or it was my dog 'cause I have a dog. So I just ignored it. Then I heard the doorbell ring. So I went up into -- through -- up -- I walked up the deck stairs, then into the house, and went to the front door, but the door was unlocked and no one was there. Okay, so that freaked me and my friends out, 'cause then we thought somebody had -- went into our house, which was really creepy to think about. So we were like looking around, and we had like a bat and stuff, 'cause it was so creepy. But, and then, um, we text my mom 'cause she has the Ring doorbell thing -- we have the Ring doorbell thing. And I texted my mom, "Can you please check the Ring doorbell?" And then ask -- and then I asked her what color shirt that that one person had on and she said, "Red." And then we looked around there was just like, you know, like those people who go door to door asking if you need like your windows cleaned? It was that guy but they didn't have any cars so I didn't see them. They were like, just on the scooter thing. I was -- it -- now me and my friends laugh about it but it was so scary in the time being.

So I fill their pizza order, right? And then the old grandpa -- like, I mean, he was a nice old man. I -- well, not to me, but, I think he was a nice old man, like not super old or anything. He had paid for the pizzas. And he looks at me and he's like, "Where's the rest of the food? You bringin' it up?" And I'm like, "What rest of the food?” Because I just made, what, like, my party sheet said to fill, which was two cheese pizzas, so that's what I made. And he's like, "We had five cheese pizza, three pepperoni, a cheese bread, and three orders of chicken tenders." And I was like, "Oh, my party sheet doesn't say that, but I can look it up on the comput- --" and then he just starts screaming at me? He just starts screaming at me. And I go get the manager because that's what you do in those kinds of situations. And I told him, "Of course, I'll put your food right in." And the manager goes and looks and he sees in the computer system where the general manager of three locations had deleted that order because she had gotten fired a couple days prior, and she was out for revenge! So then I'm trying to make these pizzas, but it takes time to make the pizzas and I have to wait the party. There was someone else helping me make the food. And, like, this guy is mad. He's saying, "Well, it's gonna be too late by the time it gets here." And I'm like, "I'm trying. I'm trying my best." But the customer's always right. So he's like, screaming at me, and I'm trying to get them drink refills and be a really cool party hostess. But at the end of the day, like, half the people got to eat and then half of them didn't. And then I started bringing up food, and then he kept saying he didn't want it, and we ended up comping all the food. But at the end of it, when my manager came up to tell him about, like, the fee waive that they were getting, he came over to me and he apologized. And he was like, "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have been yelling at you because it's not your fault." And…