“Can we at least care for longer?”

I don’t know, I just… I think that in times that I’ve felt distressed, it’s those small acknowledgments, it’s a kind word. It’s someone who recognizes maybe you don’t have the energy to cook a meal, so they’re gonna bring you out or get you something. Those are the things that seem to really matter the most. And I think something I’ve heard from a lot of people who have gone through the grieving process. It’s really hard, as there’s always a big response right after something happens. I’m thinking particularly about my uncle. His wife passed away, and I remember we went over to his house for the funeral and there was a stack of letters that was like a foot high, I think, and they were all condolence letters. My uncle and my aunt were pretty well known in their community. It was just a huge outpouring of love. But there’s sort of, like, arbitrary boundaries people set in their brains, and we all do it, of like, “This is a horrible thing that happened, you know, my aunt passing away. My, you know, my uncle must be feeling really bad.” So when they’re thinking about him that might be the first thing they think about and it could be the thing they think about, you know, years down the road of like, “Oh he lost his wife and she was a lovely person,” and but also like there comes a time sort of where that’s not the first thing people think about or they intentionally want to – not move past it exactly, but just like they don’t want that to always be the topic of conversation. Sometimes, I think people think it’s a gift to the person that’s grieving, not to bring certain things up and sometimes it probably is. But I guess, I just I think about what happened at MSU and I think about – I heard a news story and somebody was talking about I think their child had been at Sandy Hook in like sixth grade and they were also at MSU, and so they sort of knew what was coming after immediately after the shooting all of the vigils and news, you know, reporters and all these things, and they also know what happens beyond that, when sort of that dies down and you’re just left with what happened. And eventually, when people Google MSU that’s not gonna be the number one search result. Right now it is, and there’s gonna eventually be people who have no idea, you know, they’re visiting campus, they have no idea that that happened and I guess I just don’t really know what point I’m making other than I hope we can take care of each other for longer. I just feel so often with shootings in particular, it’s like it’s this gut punch, this awful thing you hear about or maybe experience, and then there’s just so much and it’s become like a joke now the “Thoughts and prayers. You know, we’re thinking about you. But no action is gonna be taken.” and I know there’s been some legislation just recently proposed in Michigan in reference to gun ownership. And so maybe there will be some change. But also there may not be. There’s a lot of political pressure, you know, on both sides in both directions and it may make it difficult for a lot – for much change to happen, I guess. So if in lieu of that, in lieu an actual solution or something that could be akin to a solution, can we at least care for a longer? Yeah, can we… Can we care for longer? And talk about it for longer and think about it for longer? And not just kind of have our brains set on whatever news cycle exists, you know, whatever that time frame is. Cause it’s so important. It’s such an important thing and it’s such an awful thing and we just have to take care of each other. 

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