“How dare I be in his recliner? That was his chair.”

"Laughter's been helping a lot. Last night I'm sitting in the recliner. Now, mind you, the recliner -- we just rewashed the cover because when we bought this cover for the recliner, it became Tux's chair. And then we put a blanket on it, and the blanket became Tux's blanket. And so we've been washing things 'cause it's, you know, reached that point. Things need to be washed. And so I'm sitting in the recliner last night. My husband says to me, "You know he'd be so pissed right now." And even though we're so sad, like, he would. How dare I be in his recliner? That was his chair. No one else could sit there. We'd have family over and everyone would just steer clear because he was sitting there. And you could not sit in it. So, made things a little frustrating I guess in some ways, but he was such a character. I miss him so much."

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“A squirrel is the weed of the animal kingdom.”

So, all this discussion of weeds makes me think about squirrels, because I actually really like squirrels and I know that some people think of them as a pest or a nuisance. And I recently -- um, well, my birthday present to myself was purchasing a bird feeder that has a camera in it. It takes videos of, um, any creature that lands on it, like a bird that, that lands and it has, then it has -- goes back to some database and identifies the bird and then like notifies me, the bird feeder owner, that there's been a visitor and I can like, you know, look at the, look at the video and, you know, pick which still shots I want to keep, if I want to keep any of them and so on. So I was off to a slow start first couple of days. I don't know, the birds didn't know about it or I didn't have the right seed in there and nobody came. Finally, I started getting some finches and a cardinal and, um, I kind of changed up the food a little bit. And then, voilà, after about a week I had my first squirrel visit. And, um, you know, some people hate when squirrels get into their bird feeders. I like squirrels, so I really don't mind. But, um, just today -- like, now the squirrel is like, seeing this little bird feeder as like -- as a true, reliable source of snacking. And I just opened the app recently 'cause I got a little notification, "Oh, you've had visitors!" And I looked and it has, you know, like this sort of set of cards, it's like a postcard every time it has a critter -- I should say bird, visits. And it was like, "27 minutes ago, squirrel. 23 minutes ago, squirrel. 18 minutes ago, squirrel." I mean it was like a stack of like, like 10 cards, of like squirrel, squirrel, squirrel, squirrel, squirrel. And I just had to laugh because that, I mean, that's like such a -- that is the perfect, um, outline of, you know, most people's experience with squirrels with their bird feeder. Once they find it, like you're really in for it. Now, I will say, also, when I went, when I went through all those cards, because a black-capped chickadee was also a visitor,…

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“My grandma spilled hot tea all over me.”

Today, I will be talking about a time that my grandma spilled hot tea all over me. So I was about one, and my grandma was babysitting me. My mom and dad were at work and I was over at her house, and she set her coffee down on -- well, her tea on a coffee table. So I was like just a baby, so I was just kind of crawling around and I hit it over onto me. And it spilled all over my stomach and chest and I got burnt. And it was, um -- then I had to go to the doctor. They had to put like a cooling rag all over my chest and stuff. And then, I had to get like a full body cast, pretty much, on my stomach and I had to stay at the hospital for like four days, just to make sure I would be fine. Then I came back home. There was -- uh, what was it? There was a bunch of people there with like gifts and stuff. My grandma thought it was her fault, but it wasn't. And she got us gifts. We got gifts and stuff, and then they all left. And that night I fell on my bed onto my stomach and it hurt a lot. So I had to go back to the hospital because my parents thought something was wrong, but it turns out I just fell on it and it didn't do anything. So we had to come back and other than that not much. After that, it just kind of slowly healed up. And I was fine, I think.

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“But the remote died and she started running after the car.”

"One time, Zoe, our dog, decided on Super Bowl night -- we were gonna let her out, and I let her out. And all of a sudden the car next door -- our neighbors, um, they're -- they had friends over, and one of the friends had like their toddler sleeping, so they were gonna go home. And the car started going. And she -- and Zoe doesn't have an electric fence or anything in the past. So um, it's very like, "Whatever, you can go outside without a leash." Like she knew that she couldn't go out of the yard, because we had like a collar, but we had like a remote to it. But the remote died and she started running after the car. And she ran -- the car -- she like almost got run over. She was like behind the car, chasing after it. And of course this was at like 10:45 at night when the halftime show was on. And, all of a sudden, like, she took off. And I was in my pajamas of course because I was dead tired. So I had to get on my bike barefoot and then I -- barefoot and I had to run after her, and she went like halfway through our neighborhood, almost onto the main road. And so I chased her on my bike. And she would not go back with me when I was on my bike. So I had to leave my bike in the middle of the road and walk her back."

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“I can’t believe they let him eat all that.”

When my mother died in 2000, my son was 11. And my cousins came, and they said they would take my kids out to eat while we were at the funeral home, doing funeral home stuff. And they took him to an ice cream place, and they let my son have as much ice cream as he wanted. Well, that was a real nice thing to do, but it wasn't a real nice thing later. He didn't throw up, but no one knows why. He has a pretty tough gut. But that was like, horrible. My, my daughter who was with him just kept on saying, "I can't believe they let him eat all that. I can't believe they let him eat all that." Anyway, he has never eaten all that, but he still likes Superman ice cream best.

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“Customers are getting eight copies of this report in their inbox…”

Have you ever pushed send on an email then realized too late that there was a mistake? One time at work, I made this happen in like an automated way that was kind of a mistake. So like the require- --  I work as a software developer. And so, we had a feature that we wanted this certifications report to go out every Monday morning to customers. And so it'd be like a list of their people and their certifications that were expiring soon. And it was just -- they just wanted this report to come to their email inbox every Monday morning. And so I built that, looked good locally, looked good in the staging environment, merged it, deployed it. But then Monday morning rolls around and customers are getting eight copies of this report in their inbox. I'm like, "Oh man. Did not mean to do that." So we were like looking into it, looking into it. We were like, "Okay, I think this is gonna work." And then the next Monday rolls around, customers still getting eight copies of this message in their inbox. And you know, we're -- our Customer Success Team is getting messages about this. They're like, "Hey, I'm getting eight copies, bluh-bluh-bluh-bluh-bluh."Yeah, it lasted for like, three or four weeks before we finally figured out, "Oh, we're running a redundant deployment in production." We have eight copies of our application server running for like a load balancing strategy, sort of. And, uh, yeah. Yeah, each one was sending this email message on a schedule whereas in our staging environment we just have one application server so it sent one email. So yeah, took us like almost a month to realize that. But then once we realized that, you know, we patched it, and it was fine, and it's fine. But, uh, but yeah. Definitely, definitely understandable to send a email that you didn't totally mean to send.

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“My legs were just totally covered in bites.”

Probably the worst experience though that I've had, um, was when I was in Belize. We went on a hike and had a picnic, um, at the top of this h- -- this hill somewhere. I'm like trying to, I'm trying to -- I can picture it in my head and there were sand flies and I -- my -- again, I had capris on and my legs were just totally covered in bites. I mean covered in bites to the point where -- we were with a, um -- we went with Intrepid Tours. So we were with this, this local guide and he looked at my legs and he was like, "Okay. Like this is more than just like a couple of bites. Like we need to -- you need some medical attention." Like he was worried that like there was -- I was having such a reaction to these bites that, you know, something, something was going to happen to me. So I don't remember if he -- I think I had to go to, I think I had to go to the pharmacist because they were like -- these ones were sort of like oozing and pus-y and like they -- this, this is like more than just like itching. There was like some other like bad things going on basically. Um, so I think -- yeah, we did. We totally went to this pharmacist and he gave me this, this cream. And I think maybe I had to take like a pill or something, some sort of anti-inflammatory or I don't know, something -- kind of a pill. And we're in a country where I don't speak the language. I can't read anything that's on, you know, the ingredient list, like I have absolutely no idea what I'm slapping on my legs, what I'm ingesting like just -- I'm trusting that these people, you know, know what they're doing. But I mean, what else am I gonna do, right? So, um, so the, so the guide like the next day, you know -- so I had started to like, kind of, put the stuff on and, you know, the next day the guide was like, "Okay, let me, you know, like let me see what's going on." So I remember -- it was actually my birthday -- and I remember like looking down at my…

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“We were just frozen there cause it stopped and the window unrolled.”

So I was with my friend and we were like walking. Well, it was like -- we had a sleepover. So it was like around like 10 at night. It was like kinda dark out and we brung flashlights and we brung these, like, really pokey pencils we could stab someone with just in case, just in case. And we made this like pepper spray with sriracha and stuff and it was -- bro, it was really weird. So, anyways, um, we made that and then we went outside and then we started walking around and we were on one side of the street. And this one guy was on the other side walking his dog. And then this car slowly pulled up to us. And then, um, and then the car slowly pulled up to us and then um -- we just were frozen there cause it stopped and the window unrolled and then we just ran, so, yeah. I don't know. It was, like, my gut probably because like an angel like, was like, telling my gut to run. So I ran. So that actually saved my life cause who knows what would have happened if me and my friend didn't run.

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